The saga of a great writer and poet

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20th of a series

Torn Apart: The Heartache of a Husband Taken by His Children from a Previous Marriage

I was warned by Madel to be cautious in talking to Romy because every word I uttered was being secretly recorded and forwarded by his ‘nanny’ to the children in Dubai – a warning that raised my awareness that someone was stabbing me in the back.

Such a scheme I thought put to shame a plot of a mediocre telenovela! Then I noticed that every time I would raise my voice to drive a point, there would be a phone call from one of the kids checking the condition of their father – a confirmation that something uncalled for was happening behind my back.

For the first time in 20 years, I felt insulted considering that I religiously performed my duties and obligations as a good wife. As a mother still in pain for the early loss of my own kids, I had no time entertaining the idea back then that the ‘nanny’ was up to some sort of conspiracy with the kids to send Romy to Dubai and to stay there for good with her as the traveling companion. Not until one day when Roreen called me inviting Romy and I to go on vacation even for only two months. I said it would be very hard for us to travel because their father is totally blind and I was not in the pink of health. 

I can still clearly recall Rona, the eldest of the siblings trying to convince me by saying “pahiram lang ng isang overnight kay Tatay”. That was it! Reading between the lines, I knew I had to say yes. I explained to the children that I cannot go because I was under heavy medication during that time and if they will agree, they can ask his ‘nanny’ to accompany him. I did not expect that that was what his ‘nanny’ was actually waiting for.

Without batting an eyelash and with a mischievous smile on her face, she agreed and even proudly announced to me that her passport was ready. I was speechless and repulsive inside. I cannot imagine my husband traveling with her for very personal reasons only the Almighty and I knew what.

Immediately thereafter, their travel documents were processed by the children without any courtesy of showing me the visa. I was made to believe that they will only stay there in the UAE for two months but as it turned out, they stayed there beyond our agreed time.

I was emotionally devastated because I felt I was betrayed to fall into what I considered a “grand conspiracy” to separate us.

To appease the madness burning inside me, I talked to my close friends about it who gave me varying opinions that only muddle my thoughts. Some said I should graciously decline the invitation considering that it was pandemic and problems might arise during the trip. Others opined that allowing him to go without me was tantamount to ‘separation’ which should not be the case because both of us are already on our way into the sunset; that we should stay together for all the remaining years of our lives; that we should remain true to our marital vow. 

Honestly, I had to tread the very fine line between my love and devotion for him as a wife and my obligation to grant the wish of his children.

I know life is not a bed of roses and there are times when I have to make a tough decision. Sacrifice like patience is a virtue. I did not argue with the kids anymore and just prepared the things Romy might need for his trip, constantly reminding him to be in touch once he reached his place of destination. Since then, he would display unusual behavior common to octogenarians suffering from dementia – asking for long lost things like money allegedly hidden somewhere; complaining of hunger when he had just eaten; concocting make-believe stories like being placed under the bed and being fed with spoiled food; and seeing his dead friends when lying in bed.

To be continued

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Mel-Bagsic-Evangelista
Melinda Bagsic Evangelista

I was born to write and I believe that’s my calling.  I love writing because it brings me to the realm exclusively of mine. It is also my opinion that “immortality” can be achieved not by searching for the Holy Grail and drinking from it but by living your life worth-writing or writing something worth-reading.  Since I cannot promise you a life worth-writing, I keep myself busy writing something worth-reading.  I am thankful to God for giving me the talent and skill to see life in different perspectives not seen by many and the courage to share it to my readers. This first ever Tutubi Digital News Magazine is a perfect avenue to bring you the many facets of life that you can ponder upon in this time of the pandemic. Enjoy reading all the articles.